We take some time to break down some common swinger lingo and terminology to help you navigate this exciting world of swinging. Of course we throw in a few stories to help spice up this lesson.
While you could go searching across the internet for the definitions to these, we bring them to you in a nice delicious package.
Here are just a few of the terms we cover:
- Vanilla
- A term swingers use to define those who do not swing. “What are you doing this weekend?” “Oh, going to a vanilla event”. “Say “hi” to your family for me.”
- Vanilla Hunting
- Finding random vanillas in real life and chatting them up in the hope of converting them… at least for an evening…
- Swinging
- The practice of engaging in group sex or the swapping of sexual partners within a group, especially on a habitual basis.
- Polyamory
- Polyamory is the practice of, or desire for, intimate long term live-in relationships with more than one partner, with the consent of all partners involved.
- Unicorn
- A single female that typically plays with both the man and woman of a couple however just the women are known to play especially when a couple is new to the lifestyle.
- Single Male
- The male equivalent of the unicorn, but it is more like a horse. They are everywhere and not hard to find. A dime a dozen.
- Cuckold
- A male that enjoys watching his female partner have sex with another male or is forced to watch. Often does not participate in activities.
- Cuckquean
- A female that enjoys watching his male partner have sex with another female or is forced to watch. Often does not participate in activities.
- Straight
- Someone having a sexual orientation to persons of the opposite sex
- Bi-Sexual
- A romantic attraction, sexual attraction, or sexual behavior toward both males and females, or to more than one sex or gender. It may also be defined as romantic or sexual attraction to people of any sex or gender identity, which is also known as pansexuality.
- Bi-curious
- A heterosexual person interested in having a sexual experience with a person of the same sex.
- Bi-from the waist up
- Kissing and breast play… who doesn’t like boobs?
- Play
- Doug & Barb from Erotic Adult Travel defined this very well “Sexual activity and/or physical interaction of a sexual nature with someone other than your partner.”
- Soft or Soft swap
- Anything short of penetration with a penis (kissing, touching, oral, finger banging)
- Full or Hard
- All on the table (with some rules) but intercourse with each other’s partners is on.
- DTF
- Quite simply a couple that is Down To Fuck, skip the conversations about the weather and the kids let’s get to business.
- No Kissing
- Playing without kissing. Some couples feel that kissing is too intimate to share with playmates, and they reserve this for their primary partner only.
- Same Room
- Both primary partners are in the same room, but on separate beds or whatever furniture they like.
- Different Room / Seperate Play
- Playing in different a different room from your primary partner. Some feel that this offers each partner the ability to focus on their new playmate without distractions, while others can feel a loss of connection with their primary partner.
- Dating Separately
- Not only are partners in different rooms, it may not even be at the same time. Sometimes referred to as an open marriage.
- Hall Pass
- Permission given by one partner to play with another couple or single by him or herself. (event or date separately)
- Exhibitionism
- Love being watched while performing any type of sexual activity.
- Voyeurism
- Love watching people have sex or performing any type of sexual activity.
- Bondage
- The sexual practice of tying up or restraining a partner. Can involve different types of stimulation to the body or not.
- Domination
- Allowing another person to exert control over you. This can vary from verbal communication to restraints to restrictions on daily activities.
- Sado-Masochism
- Sadomasochism is the giving or receiving of pleasure from acts involving the receipt or infliction of pain or humiliation.
- Bare-backing
- Sex without a condom.