The Condom Slipped Off! How To Have “THE” Conversation

[00:00] [Ed] Welcome to Swinger University, the podcast that explores the exciting and often misunderstood
world of open relationships. I’m Ed. And I’m Phoebe. And together will be your guides as we blend
sex education and sensual exploration with an intellectual twist. Have you ever been playing
with a new sexual partner and the condom slipped off? How was it communicated to you? What was your

[00:26] [Unknown] reaction? Can you come back from this? Instead of brushing it off as no big deal,

[00:33] [Phoebe] we’re going to reveal my process and outline it in our blog so it may help you address a similar
situation or any situation that involves consent and violations of consent. We’re a proof that you
can preserve the friendship and relationship if you so desire. Follow us on YouTube, TikTok,
and our social media. You can find all our links on SwingerUniversity.com.

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you’ll have access to exclusive content that’s even hotter than what we share on the podcast.
So come join our naughty community. We promise you won’t regret it. So you’re having sex.

[01:38] [Ed] Assuming that’s why you have a condom on. And it comes off. Yeah. It happened to us. I’ve had
condoms several times. Break on me before. Yes. And it’s a little alarming. Yeah.
You got to like regroup for a second. Figure out what’s going on. Yeah. You don’t know what your

[02:03] [Phoebe] partner is going to say or how they’re going to react. Right. You’re obviously probably nervous.
You’re stopping play from pretty much everyone in the room. So yeah, it’s a little
disconcerting, but it doesn’t have to be. No. And honestly, our situations have not been like that.

[02:27] [Ed] They’ve been pretty easy, pretty easy going. Yeah. And I think most of how it turns out is how you
approach it. So depending on how you deal with it, the outcome can be better or worse.

[02:45] [Phoebe] We are going to go into how to address it. But how did you for me when it happened to me?
But for you, when the condom broke, how did you address it? What did you say?

[02:56] [Ed] Well, as soon as I realized what had happened, I pulled out and informed my partner that the
condom had broken and checked in. Make sure that they were okay. And asked her if she wanted to
continue. And she was still very interested in continuing. And I said, great, I’ll get another
condom. New condom went back at it. Easy peasy. Easy peasy. But I obviously disclosed that it
didn’t happen so that she could make an informed decision about what her next steps were and what she

[03:32] [Phoebe] wanted to do. Right. And that’s the key, right? Because if you haven’t had the STI talk ahead of time
before you’re playing with your partner, now would be an opportunity to do so if they chose to,
right? So informing them of that situation gives them the opportunity to continue or not and how to
proceed next. Yeah. So ghosting, not telling the person, then ghosting them afterwards,

[04:01] [Unknown] you’re at somebody’s house that comes off and you don’t tell them and you ghost them,

[04:07] [Ed] that’s probably not the best way to handle it. Yeah. Yeah. Now we’ve we’ve had a situation with

[04:16] [Unknown] a partner who lost the condom. We suspect took it off in mid play and didn’t inform us. And we

[04:27] [Ed] have ghosted them because we have zero interest in playing with someone who would be doing something

[04:34] [Phoebe] like that. Right. And we’ve heard several accounts. I’ve heard several accounts from several
other women, two other women that that had happened. That had happened to them too. And they
suspected that that it wasn’t an accident. And so then when it happened to me, I was like, oh,
you know, I’ve heard this twice before already. Three times charm. We’re just going to we’re good.

[05:00] [Ed] We’re just going to move on from that guy. Yeah. We’re just going to move on.

[05:04] [Unknown] So who’s at fault in these situations, right? I mean, is there any one person at fault for

[05:14] [Ed] a condom slipping off or breaking? No, it really, it’s an accident. They,
typically, yeah, who slipped it off, right? Right. But condoms slip off condoms. Everybody
remember sex ed in grade school and the effectiveness of condoms is about 98%. Well, that’s because
sometimes they fail. Sometimes they come off. So and or they have holes in them or they leak.
More likely than not, it’s a catastrophic failure or it just falls off. Like that’s where most
of the failures are going to be. And I’ve had condoms start to slip off. I’m not quite as erect as
when I started and partway through. I noticed things are getting a little extra slippery. And so

[06:14] [Unknown] that’s when that’s my cue to stop for a little while and pull out do something different and

[06:23] [Phoebe] put on a new condom at some point. Sometimes people play with oils and that can degrade the
condom and that loses its integrity. Does it get kind of gets floppy? Yeah. The rubber actually

[06:41] [Ed] starts to get floppy and stretched out. It looks like it’s been like a when a balloon deflates
and it’s kind of out of shape. Yep. It looks like that. Yeah. So you can start to tell that
things are going bad. I’ve had the same thing happen with rubber gloves and working with chemicals.
And it degrade the rubber and it starts to get really loose and it starts to floppy. Right.

[07:08] [Phoebe] What about the recipient? Are they at fault? Should they be checking? Should they have better
lights on in the room? Should you be checking for me? Yeah. I think a little bit of checking

[07:26] [Ed] is healthy periodically. I think if this is a new partner that you’ve maybe never had sex with

[07:34] [Unknown] before, it’s probably good to check them before they enter you.
Right. Just to be cautious because especially if you’re in doggy or even missionary. You can’t

[07:47] [Ed] necessarily see what’s going on. That’s true. Down below. So it doesn’t hurt. And ladies,
no guy’s going to be offended if you reach down and kind of help him to get inside.
So that’s actually a really sneaky way for you to check to see if there’s a condom.
I don’t think it’s the responsibility of a woman to make sure that their partner has a condom,
but I think it’s reasonable for them to be cautious. Maybe a tiny bit paranoid if it’s a new partner.

[08:22] [Unknown] And just double check. You know, trust but verify. I think the recipient should be responsible,

[08:32] [Phoebe] especially in a group play situation where there’s a lot going on. So if I’m kissing another woman

[08:42] [Unknown] and my partner wants to come enter me, but I’m occupied, I don’t really want to stop making out

[08:53] [Phoebe] with another woman to check to see if he has a condom. But in a sense, I am responsible for checking.
It’s nice to trust that that person will do that. And of course, if it’s a new partner, definitely.

[09:08] [Unknown] But if now I was going to say if it’s an ongoing partner, then you shouldn’t have to use that

[09:16] [Phoebe] same type of protocol. Although I have had a good friend say they’ve had some long-term partners
that have tried to sneak it off and sneak it in. So, you know, I guess whatever’s

[09:29] [Ed] yeah, and I feel uncomfortable saying that it’s a woman’s fault for not checking, right? That’s
almost victim blaming, which is why I was hesitant to kind of go that direction. I wouldn’t say

[09:42] [Phoebe] fault, but I would say there’s some responsibility for making sure yeah, someone has put one on.

[09:48] [Ed] In the traditional sense that it takes two to tango, right? Your sex partners. So yeah,
I think it makes sense that you double-check that your partner’s being responsible.
Sometimes they get all caught up in the moment and they’re very anxious to be with you,

[10:08] [Unknown] they forget sometimes. Not great, but that’s also why both people need to

[10:19] [Ed] double-check and make sure that everything’s going on the right way. So we’ve already talked about

[10:24] [Phoebe] distractions in the room. The room could be dark, which they frequently are. The lights are low.
Right. And there’s that sex position that we also were talking about, right? Even missionary,

[10:35] [Unknown] doggy, missionary, whatever position, as women, we really don’t have eyeballs down there. You

[10:41] [Phoebe] guys get to see all the good stuff. Right. We don’t get to see any of that. No. Unless I’m behind you

[10:47] [Unknown] while you’re fucking somebody else. Or this camera. Oh, yeah, that’s too, too. And a big screen

[10:52] [Ed] TV being broadcast, too, which is so much fun. Which is so much fun. Yeah, we haven’t done that. Wow,

[11:01] [Unknown] really a long while. There’s no time like the present. Oh my goodness. All right. We’re going to
describe what happened. My story. And then we’re going to launch into how we had the conversation

[11:16] [Phoebe] and the technique we used. And this was really a great technique that I got from the consent

[11:25] [Unknown] academy. And I’m going to share it with you. And I’m going to put it in a blog so that you have it
in case you want to use this. So here’s the story. Long-term friendship. Several years. Yes.

[11:40] [Phoebe] Seeing them at multiple parties. Love them dearly. And how to great report. We just never got
down with them. Mostly because I think we thought they were new and we were respecting their boundaries.

[11:57] [Unknown] And they were new. But we didn’t know they were shy. Well, I thought they were more shy than they

[12:06] [Phoebe] maybe really are. I thought that they came off more shy. But what we learned was basically

[12:13] [Ed] they didn’t know how to pull the trigger. Right. It’s the closing the deal that transition thing,
which is so hard for so many couples. Right. And we were being respectful of their newness
and not being pushy. We didn’t transition well either. No. So we had this constant miss miss miss.
We had some great dinners and late evening conversations. But it could have been so much better.

[12:41] [Unknown] It could have been. So we the night happens. Right. We have them over. We’ve got snacks and we had
some dinner planned and we had some drinks. And the misses and I did a lingerie change. And basically,

[13:04] [Ed] once that happened, it went from lingerie to naked in like five minutes. Right. So her and I come

[13:12] [Phoebe] down the hall. We’re standing in the front entryway, which opens out to the living area where you
and the mister was. And you guys come running over to us at the entryway. So we didn’t even get out
into the living space. No. And then fondling and kissing happened. And then all of a sudden,

[13:32] [Unknown] we’re back to the bedroom. Right. So the the best and worst part about lingerie is it will totally

[13:40] [Ed] kick the party off. But that also means you’re probably only wearing it for about four seconds.
Yes. It looks great for five seconds. Yep. But you know, it served as purpose. It

[13:54] [Phoebe] kicked off the party. Yes. So we’re playing. We’re playing and we’re having a really good time.
You’re at the on one end of the bed. I’m on the side of the bed. I think we’re going in this
L shape on the bed. And we were having a really good time. Yeah. We tried all kinds of different stuff.
Different toys. Lots of fun. Different toys. Yeah. Different positions. And fun, laughing,
good conversation and just getting down to it. Right. Right. And so we wrap it up at one point
because we were we’re getting thirsty. And I think the missing dinner. Oh, that’s right.

[14:38] [Ed] We hadn’t had dinner. We were we had snacks. And then we went straight to business because we
were like, we’re not messing this up this time. We’re going to we’re going to transition

[14:48] [Phoebe] better than we’ve ever transitioned. Yeah. And so then we had we cooked dinner. We ate dinner.
And we hung out for another hour or so. And then they left. Yep. It was a great evening.
It was really nice. So Ed and I are having sex the next morning. And I will and I will tell you

[15:09] [Unknown] that not every time due Ed and I have reclaimed sex as somebody some some people call it or
connective sex or what’s the other term that people use? Yeah. Reconnective sex. Reconnective sex.

[15:25] [Phoebe] Yeah. Reconnective or reclaimed. We don’t always do that now after we’ve played with another

[15:31] [Unknown] couple. We used to always do that in the beginning. It was like essential necessary, right?

[15:37] [Phoebe] To re get that bond back. But now we’re like, we’re good. I’m not going anywhere. I’m not going
anywhere. He’s not going anywhere. Like we’re super comfortable. We’re doing it the next morning.
So this is it. That’s important. And fucking me, I’m having a really good time. All of a sudden,
you know, I’m looking at his face. I’m like, oh, he’s having a great time. And then his,
he stops. And then he sticks his fingers in me and he’s like doing his finger tour like, oh,
I’m thinking, oh, wow, this is kind of nice. This must be a new technique that he learned the night

[16:15] [Unknown] before. Fun. He’s practicing it on me. Oh, awesome. So all of a sudden, there’s a condom on his finger.
Right. He’s looking at his finger. I’m looking at his face. He looks at me. My heart drops.

[16:38] [Phoebe] I’m speechless. I try to speak. And I’m going, I live. I don’t even know what to say.

[16:45] [Ed] We’re not even sure what happened or what we’re like connecting the dots.

[16:50] [Phoebe] I’m trying to connect the dots. I’m trying to piece it together. I’m super shocked. And I’m thinking
what if I didn’t, what if you didn’t find that this morning? What if you didn’t find it for three days?
Right. I didn’t, wouldn’t have known it’s in there. I’ve lost a tampon in there before and I didn’t know
it was in there. Yeah. Until bad things started to happen. So that could have been really bad for me.
So I’m upset. I’m angry. And the whole euphoria of the night before, you know,
the the feels from that amazing experience we’re gone. Yeah. Kind of went downhill.

[17:36] [Unknown] What’s, you know, all that? What the other couple? So we sat around, I don’t know for like an hour,

[17:44] [Phoebe] trying to piece this together, trying to figure it out. And then we’re going in our mind like,

[17:49] [Ed] oh my God, you know, do we? How do we approach this? What do we say? What do we do? What about STIs?

[17:56] [Phoebe] I’m too angry to talk about it. I wasn’t given a choice. What if I got something now?
What if they lied about something now? Ed’s got it because I didn’t have a choice and

[18:09] [Unknown] informed choice last night to right, abstain from sex with my partner because I knew about it last
night, all the things, all the things, all the things. It was a bad day. So I decided I needed to wait

[18:26] [Phoebe] process these emotions. I knew it would probably take two or three days. And I wanted to see if they

[18:31] [Ed] would say anything come through with ontopology. Right. Based on the assumption they knew that they

[18:40] [Phoebe] knew. Right. And I know everyone’s going, oh my God, of course he knew. But he didn’t.

[18:50] [Ed] And I can say that there have been times when, for example, when the condom broke on me,
I didn’t realize immediately that it had broken. So you’re going in for one stroke, two stroke,
three stroke, and you’re like, this is really smooth. This is, this is extra smooth.
And then of course, you know, the other part of the brain kicks in at some point and says, huh,

[19:22] [Unknown] I wonder if there’s something, something’s wrong. But you don’t always realize that at first.

[19:31] [Ed] Especially if you’ve been having a prolonged period of sex, you’re desensitized a little bit,

[19:38] [Unknown] it all starts to kind of numb a little bit. And you don’t, don’t always know. Right. And so I

[19:49] [Phoebe] could not step into the shoes of the man until day three. I was very angry. And I thought,
of course he knows, of course he knows. There’s no way he wouldn’t know. And then I stepped into
ed shoes and I started to ask Ed a bunch of questions. And I said, okay, I asked him the question
that you just answered, which was, can you feel anything different? Sometimes. So then I asked,
how can you not feel the tight band that’s like gripping your penis at the base? How can you not
feel that pressure? And what is your answer? Well, if you’ve started to go a little soft,

[20:36] [Unknown] you don’t have that tight pressure. Right. And it changes. It’s always changing. Like it’s not

[20:47] [Ed] on and off. It’s degrees of hardness. And it comes up and down throughout the evening.

[20:58] [Phoebe] Right. And the day and the night and all that too. And in the morning, especially in the morning.
So I wasn’t aware of that. I wasn’t thinking of that. I’m just thinking it’s hard. You know,
you’re going to feel the pressure. You’re going to feel this rubber sensation because everyone complains

[21:19] [Unknown] about how it’s horrible to have sex with a condom. And I’m thinking it’s got to be obvious.

[21:28] [Ed] But you’re telling me not really. Yeah. All right. So let’s say this happens.
There’s a condom slip. And you’ve just been through this situation with another couple.

[21:44] [Unknown] How do you handle it? How do you bring it up and have that conversation?

[21:58] [Ed] We need your help so that your community, the very one you love and have so much fun with,
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[22:17] [Unknown] subscribe and turn on notifications. We can’t emphasize enough how much this helps the

[22:23] [Ed] Swinger community. And it truly is up to you to make that happen. It makes a massive difference

[22:29] [Unknown] in whether new listeners can even find us. And here’s the thing. When someone searches Swinger

[22:36] [Ed] podcast, the algorithm doesn’t care how good our content is or how long we’ve been around.

[22:43] [Unknown] It only cares about ratings and reviews. We’d appreciate it. And your community will really
appreciate it. Thanks for listening. I didn’t have any tools to do this until recently. And

[23:05] [Phoebe] I’m going to share those with you in a second. And now this ideally, you would do if you’re
wanting to preserve the friendship and not just ghost them. If it was an okay interaction,
you don’t think you’re ever going to see them again in the community or ever.

[23:19] [Ed] Right. It was one thing. Sure. You know, maybe you don’t, maybe you don’t want to reach out

[23:24] [Phoebe] to them. You just get your STI test. And then you contact them later if something comes up,
right, from your test. It’s all up to you. But let’s say you want to preserve the relationship.
So what I did was I told them ahead of time what had happened in a text message.
So I, because I didn’t want to blindside them. First, I was going to blindside them.
But I said, that was not a good idea. So I said, Hey, I want to talk to you about something that

[23:55] [Unknown] happened the other night. Let’s set a set up a Zoom call. And they said fine. And so then I told
them what happened. And they were really like freaked out. And honestly, um, embarrassed.

[24:11] [Ed] Yes. And very empathetic about the whole thing. Yes. Yes, they were. They were also very apologetic.

[24:25] [Phoebe] Right. And wanted to get into the details. But I told them I needed that extra day to continue
processing. Right. And so we set the date. And I wanted to give them time to process that
information as well. Because I had already had a few days. And so I thought it was only fair for
them to talk between each other. They had been at work. And you know, they needed to discuss it.
Right. So I used the consent Academy process for when consent is broken. And
here, before I get into that, I always keep saying before I get into that, the reason I used
the consent model is because it was technically consent. He consented to wear a condom.

[25:19] [Unknown] And we consented to have safe sex. Right. Consent was broken when the condom fell off. Was it

[25:27] [Phoebe] was it an accident? Yes. But consent was still broken. And there was still damage done. So
going through that process is important. And so I started off with I want to talk to you about
something that occurred when we all played together. But I already told them that, right? Right.

[25:51] [Unknown] And I said, I’m presenting this in this way because I really do feel like the friendship can be

[25:59] [Phoebe] repaired. Right. And I want to use the steps that consent to help me explain what occurred
in the most neutral way that I can. And I recognize that it was an accident and no one is
no one is to blame. So I stayed at the obvious that the condom slipped off and was lost inside me.
And that the agreement was that a condom would be worn and that the condom fell off
therefore that agreement and consent was broken. Right. It was an accident, but the impact is still
there. So I expressed my feelings. And then I expressed how it impacted me. The third thing I
expressed was the unknown future impact it would have on me. I expressed what I would like.
That was number four. Number five is what I need. And number six is how to make amends. Right.
And in all of that, my feelings were disappointment that the information wasn’t disclosed to me
right away or even days later. But you know, in hindsight, they did not know until I told them

[27:12] [Unknown] I had feelings of sadness and some anger. It removed all the excitement like we talked about

[27:18] [Phoebe] from from that good experience, that sexual interaction. And I really did feel deeply

[27:26] [Unknown] disrespected and disappointed because I thought they knew. Right. Right. And they just chose not to
tell me that that wasn’t the case. Right. It impacted me and my ability to make decisions about

[27:42] [Phoebe] my physical health and what I chose to do with my body and how I chose to share my body with you.
So by delaying the knowledge that the conum was off, I couldn’t provide you with the choice
of abstaining sex with me. Right. In case I had an STI, then you wouldn’t get it. Therefore,
you wouldn’t have to be on medicine or go to the doctor and all that nonsense. Right. Comes
with all that stuff. Right. Yeah. It would just be with me and we could have worked that out.
The delayed knowledge of the conum being in there and then not finding it, I could have got a
yeast infection or bacterial infection, which would have been a trip to the doctor and the pharmacy
and medicines and blah, blah, blah, blah. So the unknown future impact was infections, the STI,
potential costs, time off from work, the time for, I mean, I got trying to get a telehealth
visit or an inductor visit going to the pharmacy and getting the medicine, all that stuff around STIs.
It’s a lot. And then being on some medicines, you can’t drink alcohol. Now that’s impacted my
quality of life because I can’t have a drink because I’m on special meds. Right. And I can have
sex with you for several weeks. This is all the case scenario if I had an STI, right. Future
impact. Yeah. But I’m thinking down those roads because I don’t really know. Now we covered that
conversation before we played. But I still want to cover that conversation again with them.

[29:28] [Unknown] So I do. And the next thing I ask for is an apology. And I ask if there are any other STIs that I

[29:39] [Phoebe] need to be aware of that they didn’t disclose or feel comfortable disclosing before. Like if you were
kind of hiding it before, now I really need to know. It’s not everybody’s honest. You think they are
and you you trust that people are. Right. And I really wanted our friendship to continue.
I also said that if we were to, you know, have another encounter again, that I was no longer

[30:05] [Ed] going to be in a doggy position because yeah, condoms just have issue with you and doggy.

[30:11] [Phoebe] I tend to rip them off. Yeah. And I ask for multiple condom checks when you’re inside me,
periodically reach down a check, finding the right size condom. If we don’t have one, then
bring some of your own that are latex free. Right. And if it slips off, immediately disclose it to me.

[30:33] [Ed] Even if you don’t know if it came off, if you think it might have talk about it because
a little finger search just to double check is well worth it. Right. And we haven’t gotten into

[30:52] [Phoebe] his story, which you’re going to get into right after I finished step four and five.
Step four is how to make amends. And honestly, I wasn’t really sure what that was. And I told him,

[31:07] [Unknown] I’m not sure how to make amends for this. And then the last step was how to prevent it.

[31:12] [Phoebe] Better lighting, right size condom, frequent condom checks, counting your condoms. Right.

[31:18] [Unknown] Which, honestly, can be tricky. Sometimes if you’re in an orgy, the room star, you’ve had multiple

[31:25] [Phoebe] sessions, right? Sometimes you lose track. Sometimes you lose track of your condoms.
Have your partner pay attention for you or help you. And then, you know, there’s a downside,
of course, to all that. And it takes away your focus of play. If you’re watching,

[31:44] [Unknown] if you’re being safety checker. Right. Yeah. So the summary of steps before we get into his

[31:51] [Phoebe] side of the story is what occurred feelings, the impact, unknown future impact. So everyone
is dying to know, like, how did this possibly happen? Did he apologize? Yes. Of course.

[32:08] [Ed] What was his story? So as I had kind of suspected this, you know, condoms sometimes get sloppy

[32:19] [Unknown] and loose. And when it had happened, he’d looked down on the ground and there was a condom there.

[32:27] [Ed] And he had made the assumption that the condom that was on the ground was the condom that had come off.
And if anything, it’s a lesson in when you take a condom off, don’t throw it on the floor.
First, because if it’s somebody else’s house party, you might forget to clean it up. And it’s just
respectful to clean up at a house party. Not that that was an issue here, because we were going

[32:53] [Unknown] to clean up afterwards. But secondarily, keeping it up off the floor means that you know which condoms

[33:01] [Ed] are where and which ones were used. And you can kind of put them out in a place where you know that

[33:10] [Unknown] it was used. And when you took it off. Right. If it’s just on the floor, you might have something

[33:17] [Ed] like this happen where you think it fell off. And that’s the one. But it’s not the condom that fell

[33:23] [Phoebe] off. Of course, I had all kinds of questions around that, which was how do you not know it’s it fell
off. Like you’re pulling your penis out of a vagina. How do you not feel it’s slipping off? How do

[33:37] [Ed] you not see it fall? Well, in our last episode where we talked about kissing, we talked about
how many nerve endings are there. Penis doesn’t have all that many nerve endings as much as you think.
So it’s not as delicate as your fingertips or your mouth to be able to have those kinds of
sensations. And so it’s kind of a for lack of a better description, a blunt instrument. It
feels a lot. It feels really good to rub it on things, but it doesn’t have that kind of tactile
sensitivity that like a finger does to know when things are there and when they’re not. And like I
said, if you’ve been playing for a while, you do get a little desensitized. And those nerve endings

[34:22] [Unknown] are not quite as tingly as they are before. Now in my perspective, I think if I had been in that
situation, I probably would have said, okay, I’m just going to double check. I think the condom came
out and off. But let’s just check. Because I’ve had condoms, like I said, break and fall off. And I’ve

[34:51] [Ed] wanted to make sure that all the bits and pieces are out because foreign objects floating around

[34:55] [Unknown] down in there, not such a good thing. Right. So that’s my tip that if it does actually come off,

[35:04] [Ed] double check, she’ll appreciate it. And who knows? Maybe it’s another round of fingering and

[35:10] [Unknown] oral. And you have some other fun. But yeah, double check. Right. I have had, you know, condoms

[35:21] [Phoebe] come off inside me, but they’re like, they’re like half in half out. You can see them. Yeah.
And so the guy will say, he’s pulled out and he’s pulled out of the condom. And my right.
So he has gripped the condom. And it’s sticking half out. And he’s like, oh, and then he’ll pull
it out and he’ll show me. And he goes, I pulled out. It was still inside you. And then we look to see

[35:45] [Ed] if all the pieces are there. So imagine if you had been wetter and he’d pulled out and it had
also come out at the same time. So he’s slipping out and it’s slipping out of you at the same time.

[35:58] [Phoebe] It’s possible that it could have fallen out. We, you know, had some, we have some rules now to move
forward with condom play, count, check, give you some better lighting. I’ll check. He’ll do periodic
checks, maybe wear a different size condom, whatever. Yeah. So and change positions. And I, I,
from that process I learned, I can do that with other partners in the future to help, you know,
this situation to, to, to lessen the chance of that happening. Yeah. It’s going to happen again.
Sure. You’re just lowering your risk for it. Correct. Correct. Of course, our friends felt horrible
and they were very good listeners. And he apologized and they loved actually that I spoke up about
it rather than let it do. And as a, as a result, I feel like we have a stronger friendship now. And
that we all learned something from this experience. Until next time, stay curious and keep

[37:03] [Unknown] learning. Oh, one last thing before you go. If this episode helped you in any way, the single best

[37:22] [Ed] thing you can do to support the show is leaving a rating and review. It takes 60 seconds and helps
new people find us when they’re searching for relationship education. And we’ve made it easy.
Visit SwingerUniversity.com forward slash review. All the instructions are there.

[37:44] [Unknown] Thank you for being part of this community. We’ll see you again soon.